The Day I Cried at Daycare

For the last month or so, Ingrid had had some trouble going to sleep at daycare. Her schedule had recently changed, so it felt normal. 

This week she hasn't taken a nap at daycare. As in, no naps in almost three days. 

Yesterday, I talked to the staff about some possible solutions. Talk about going to sleep, bring in a pillow and blanket from home. And by pillow I mean a gigantic, stuffed, flat pink unicorn. 

Today, I hauled in said pillow and left feeling confident that everyone had to tools to get little Ingrid to sleep. 

After work, I walked into her room and found a giggly Ingrid playing with a maraca. Checked her daily report and found out that she played outside in the garden, colored a picture, ate as much hummus as possible and didn't have a nap. 

Then, I asked the teachers about the no-nap situation and listened to the run-down. As I was listening, I could feel tears welling up in my eyes knowing that of course, they did their best to put her to sleep. She was interested in just about everything but sleep and would be a hot mess tonight.  

You know when you're talking and not being listened to? Scratch that. You know that feeling when you're not being heard? In that moment, I felt like no one was really istening and I could feel myself turning the corner into Crazyville. 

I didn't raise my voice, or get snappy - I just started to cry while vocalizing my concerns. But lets not lie - snappy or not, I cried in front of teachers, toddlers and I'm assuming a few parents. Painful. 

It wasn't really a true "cry", but more of a release-of-emotions-housed-in-frustration cry that was - well, probably a little uncomfortable to watch. 

The lead teacher stepped in and offered me words of encouragement and promised to resolve the issue. I repeated various apologies as I exited the room with mixed emotions. 

I was embarrassed. I was sniffling. And, I was somehow relieved they understood how I felt. Then again, I felt embarrassed that I couldn't communicate the importance of this issue without the tears. 

I think this goes without saying, but since no one asked, I'll tell you: I love Ingrid's daycare. It's wonderful, the ratio is unheard of, the teachers are so loving and so experienced and everyone cares about their jobs - and about Ingrid. 

But, today is the day I cried at daycare over naps. 

Not because I was tired or for some other outside reason. I cried because I felt bad for my daughter and needed a solution to this problem. A problem that is solvable.  

On the scale of Shitty Things to Happen in Life, I know this ranks about a 1.5, but I'm now the Mom Who Cried in the Butterfly Room and tonight, it's painfully awkward.