Weekend

On Friday, I took a vacation day to be with Ingrid. Since it was raining, we kept our jammies on, read all morning, went to the library, picked up Aunt Kirsten at the train station and then, had lunch at the Public Market.

That afternoon, my sister and I took turns reading Eyes, Noes and Mouth to Ingrid for about three hours (the girl is obsessed). It was one of the best vacation days I've had in a long time. 

That night my sisters and I saw Hunger Game - which lived up to the hype. So good. 

Then, we went to Palms for a dark beer and some deep conversation about recent Target finds. 

Today we went for a walk, baked some banana bread and saw my grandpa at his hospice center. 

I'm thankful we all visited him this afternoon but, during the ride home I cried. Because the thought of loosing your grandparent is sad. And the thought of your dad loosing his dad is sad. And knowing that my daughter won't remember him is sad. The compounding sadness of these thoughts brought me to tears during the car ride home.

Typically, Ingrid does not fall asleep quietly in the car. She looses a pacifier or cries for a bit, but today she just fell asleep and I was thankful because I was able to cry and think without fishing out a pacifier from the depths of her never-ending car seat crevices.   

Somehow, she's still sleeping and I'm thankful for the time to just be with my thoughts and throw myself a brief pity party.

Yesterday was filled with the giggles and quiet moments between Ingrid and I. Today, feels like the opposite.

I'm trying to muster up the energy to make a to-do list, go grocery shopping or at the very minimum, throw in a load of laundry. I'm dragging my feet to just get through this day. 

Big, important thoughts are getting muddled by little annoying ones. I'm thinking about my grandpa while feeling annoyed by the fact that I have to get a new phone.   

Weekends are a time to regroup. A time to clean, cook and organize things and thoughts. Spending time with family and friends. Enjoying a cocktail or three. Time to practice yoga and run. And spend time with Ingrid. 

I've surrendered to this big-thought-little-thought whirlwind I'm in and decided to plan Ingrid's baptism/dedication while thinking about what I'd like to make to celebrate tomorrow's Mad Men episode.