How we got to this new, weird, apartment where Harper sleeps on an ottoman.

So, a lot of things have changed since Ingrid's birthday. Short list:

• I got a new job! 
• Our closing date got pushed back.
• Dan and I went to Chicago! 
• We moved out of our little apartment. 
• We moved into a tiny apartment.
• Good news: I'm less stressed about the upcoming Listen to Your Mother show because, it doesn't involve packing tape.  

I won't bore you with the details because they are essentially more embarrassing for me than they are boring. Thankfully, the new job has been wonderful. I don't even care that I'm in this "honeymoon" state where nothing is wrong and I assume everyone is probably a joy to work with. You know when you emerge from the other end of a breakup and start to date again? Only then can you see your ex for what he was. It's a lot like that. I feel like I'll be able to wake up happy (again!) and enjoy productive, positive days. 

I'll get real with you. Right now, I'm totally cool with this temporary situation. 24 hours ago when we didn't have internet, shampoo or a functioning knife - well, that was a different story. Side bar: baby shampoo is amazing for volume. Should you ever be in such a bind. 

The facts of this unplanned situation: our home buying process didn't line up with our lease and we're living in a bizarre furnished apartment. I'm walking on sunshine at my new job but I'm new and not yet comfortable. At home and at work nothing feels settled. Add the Listen to Your Mother event and Dan's graduation and we're just a ball of transition around here. We're eating meals out of the home more that I'd like. Harper hasn't had enough walks hence, this day-before-the-move surprise: 

But here's what's amazing: even if for some reason, this house doesn't work out, we'll be moving into our first house at some point. Dan will be done with school. Ingrid will once again watch Bubble Guppies. I'll eventually feel at home at work and at home. Harper will have a new park and new doors to destroy. 

To wrap up this weird, raw and honest post - here are some recent pictures: 

Happy and squinty.

Bay View Bread.

Happy Second Birthday!

Boom! It's a doll house.

Watching Bubble Guppies. Natch.

"I'm getting notes of...vanilla, awesomeness and sprinkles. For sure, sprinkles."

Whipped-cream hangover.

And now, Chicago.

Hashtag trending: tea.

Delicious, tea.

My first trip to The Bean!

Awkwardly holding it up. I guess.

Looks like we need more tea.

Off to The Aviary and The Girl and The Goat. #pretendingtobefancy

Do we want warm, tea-infused tequila? You bet we do.
#tea 

Hello!

Naturally posing on the ledge while looking at dozens of people waiting in line to do the same thing.

Natural.

We are up high.

Yolk. Eggcellent choice. Man, do I love breakfast.

Nice {bronze} legs.

Thanks for sticking with this one. More to come!

Trouble

Today, I spent the day in Chicago for work. It was a fun day of visits and learning, but a long taxing calorie-filled day.

As the tracks rumble beneath my feet, I’m dreaming about returning to Chicago for a fun family visit. Trips to fun restaurants, museums and shops with Ingrid in tow.

In reality this would involve an insane amount of planning, packing and as the questions about car seats start to pop into my head (“Could we take the train and ideally not pack the car seat? Do we need one in a cab? Yes. Could we just…walk or take the L”) – I can almost see Dan and I exchanging looks that say: Is This More Trouble Than It’s Worth?

Often times the answer is No. For example yesterday, we were literally a mile from the mall and realized that we forgot the stroller. In a decision fueled by pure (unnecessary) panic, we decided to go home, grab the stroller and head back to the mall to get Dan a new pair of shoes. We were caught off guard, but our decision to get the stroller was worth it.

The point? I have finally come to grips with the fact that as she gets older and more mobile, traveling with Ingrid presents new challenges that sometimes beg the question – Is This More Trouble Than It’s Worth?

It’s nice to reflect and remember the days when I could just simply toss Ingrid in an infant car seat and carry on about my day shopping and lunching with friends.

But isn't the past always a bit sparklier in our memories?

Because, ten months ago I was painfully calculating her last feeding, her last nap and taking constant diaper bag inventory. I was nursing, recovering from major surgery and adjusting to life with a baby. I was constantly on edge as to what would happen next.

But here’s what I remember. Leisurely lunches with girlfriends, solo shopping trips (during off-peak hours!) and long walks with Harper with a perfectly silent sleeping baby (see, sparklier in memory!).

Yes, Ingrid grows and changes. And so do my priorities. I have surrendered to the fact that we have a baby and some things we did pre-baby just don't make that much sense anymore. Surrendered and lovingly accepted. When Ingrid was first born, we pretty much did everything we did before I got pregnant - we just had a baby. As she's grown and we've settled into life with her. Friday nights with a movie and pizza are welcomed. I just want to chill out and enjoy our family.

Slowing down and focusing on what matters takes effort but it's totally worth the trouble.